Happy Sunday! Hope everyone is slowly adjusting to the time change better than I am – woke up at 11:30 AM today feeling like HELL froze over so I’m hoping an early night, detox tea + an overnight face mask will make tomorrow a much better day.
In celebration of International Women’s Day (which in actuality, should be every day so I’m not sure why we need just one day to signify women’s importance), I spent some time with my little sister and mom this weekend. Though I only had 72-hours at home, it was more than enough. Do you feel as you get older, you get along with your family better in shorter periods of time? Because I don’t live at home anymore, I am ten times more civilized with my siblings and there are no more screaming matches that existed daily when I was in high school and my sister was just hitting her adolescent years. Ah the good old days. It feels like just yesterday my brother was a little toddler and nowadays, he’s almost taller than me and can give me piggy-back rides with ease.
I made a conscious effort to not use technology as much (ok lies, I played a lot of SimCity on my phone), and was able to finish Platform by Michel Houellebecq in between Disney Netflix marathons with my brother, which included both Pocahontas movies, Mulan and Catching Fire because I love JLaw.
Platform began slowly, which may be because of the differences in writers’ syntax and styles; this novel was originally published in French and translated after its success. At times, it felt like a guidebook because it touched upon the specific mechanisms of the tourism industry in Europe and Asia. However, once I got used to his writing style, I loved how raw and provocative his style of writing was and how real the characters were. The story follows a middle-aged, slightly potbellied man named Michel who goes on a trip to Thailand and meets a beautiful young woman named Valerie. What follows is an intense and loving relationship that goes through hell and back and back again. Once I got to the final part, I couldn’t put it down and my heart was crushed at the end. I will admit, this is not for everyone and especially not for those who want to read a simple love story. If you want complex and excuse my french, a little fucked up, this is for you!
There was one passage that stuck out to me near the end of the book when Valerie revisits her life and wants a lifestyle change:
“More money to do what?” said Valerie emphatically. “Buy Prada handbags? Spend a weekend in Budapest? Eat white truffles in season? I’ve earned a lot of money, and I can’t even remember where it’s gone, though yes, I’ve probably spent it on stupid things like that. Do you know where your money goes?” (pg. 234).
If you’ve been following my ramblings, you can get a general sense that since I’ve left my job, I’ve kind of lost my sense of identity. As a young professional, I feel like when you go out and socialize, the first question is “Oh! What do you do?” Though I am still freelancing and determined to continue taking meetings and slowly moving my music industry career forward, I’m almost embarrassed to admit that I’m still looking and haven’t found the right place yet. But this passage really made me realize, at the end of the day, money is money and a career is great and fulfilling, but I also must remember to live my life without it depending on my job. My job does not define me. I am me and I am more complex than the money I make (which let’s be honest now, half of it goes to groceries and rent and the other half to stupid shit) and the job title I hold at age 21.
I tell my friends all the time when they’re stressed at work that they have to take a timeout to spend time with others. Work does not come home and cuddle you at night. Your family, friends and boy/girlfriends will do that. As fulfilling as a career is and I personally am ITCHING to continue my career, I am trying to be very thankful that this break means I get to spend more time with A, my family + all my other girl friends that I haven’t seen in a while. I have to take the advice I give and make sure I apply it to my own life too.
And I can admit, I am getting better at it on some days, and other days I’m really bad at wallowing in my self-pity. But today is a good day and tomorrow will be one too. I’m listening to a great acoustic bedtime station, reading my new book Still Alice and have plans to catch up on the Oscar movies and see Whiplash this week.
Life is good and I’m falling asleep with a smile on my face. I’m ready to spring forward.